Nah well, in a way, tokyanime is right. However... some people are happy with their flaws, others are on the brink of a lethal depression. And my Oresamaism (the overconscious obscene braggard you know me as) doesn't reach that far. I've always been extremely unhappy about the way I look, and especially BECAUSE I'm young, I suffer from it. The other girls my age use boys like tampax (not going into detail of this figure of speech) and run over the beach half-naked while I hide in a huge heap of clothes even in summer. My definition of "beautiful and happy" is the opposite of what I am.
The photos you've seen of me are probably of my face and torso as I usually avoid showing more. I have quite a slim face and my torso is more or less ok. But below, I'm wide for two.
Here's a almost-full body "A1 End Pan"-shot of me, taken on Friday. Hint, I only fit into that T-shit when contracting my stomach muscles to the point it hurts.
http://animexx.4players.de/weblog/?kategorie=14774
Working out would be an option if all that fat hadn't gotten me a complex that keeps me from running about with all that blubber. And I'm not a patient person. I want to rid myself off of all this crap at once, not over months. Plus, I'm on a weight loss facility (lap banding) for 4 years and only lost 40 kilos.
Plus, heavy weight loss (like those 40 kilos) can produce empty bags of excess skin to an extent noone can re-tighten it themselves.
If I didn't have my pets to take care of, I'd participate in The biggest Loser (TV weight loss programme), but then I'd be required to leave home for 2 months, and my dog and cats won't approve of that. PLUS, I'm not social enough to share a room with females (I really don't get along with women for more than 1 week when sharing a room) without carnage. That's a minor consideration though, harrharr.
You know, you're right when you say the natural way is best. But what if it doesn't work for me? You need discipline, patience and faith and I lack all of those. Only the quick and easy way works for me, as sad as this may seem. I do try some improvised evening gym beside the bathtub and I plan to do 3-hour-walks with my dog every sunday. But that only keeps me from gaining weight and doesn't help me lose it. I asked my classmate to get me into contact with his d----- to get some sp--- but he's too good a friend as to help me get my hands on d----. (I'm censring this because I know this board is frequented by kids who don't need to have the same ideas as me. On the same occasion, sorry for not warning of the photos - they're gross indeed, especially of the last patient).
Feel free to say "ass" :) I'm not that tight with "language". I guess most of you know that ;)
@Zag
"Kliniek" is the Dutch word :) It's a Dutch site, and their English isn't perfect. The cute thing about this language is that they spell things the way they're pronounced. If English was the same, "passepartout" would be spelled "pusspartoo". I think it's adorable ;) I'm German, not Dutch, and these languages are very similar, however, Dutch sounds like a baby language version of German to Germans ^^;
I appreciate everyone's thoughts as long as they're honest :) A while ago, I decided to face and utter any honest thoughts, opinions, confessions and deeds because I decided that honesty is the only way to obtain honesty. Took me a while to figure that out, harrharr (hey, why was this underlined??)
