Makoto Shinsengumi

eanie, meanie, minie, moe
last modified: Tuesday, February 20, 2007 (12:09:15 AM)
I used to blog a lot, although that probably sounds weird as I’ve managed to blog quite a bit the past few weeks. Anyway at times I find it very therapeutic, other times quite destructive. The past year I’ve made a resolution that I shall no longer blog in my journal accounts as I find that online blogs makes it easy to just say things that otherwise you wouldn’t say. Not that I’m a coward but my fingers get way ahead of me and sometimes a little prudence and tact should be in order. Oh there are days that I want to go back and just blog to put callouses on my fingertips and run this keyboard to the ground because my head is burning with thoughts, opinions and the like. But thank heavens I find something else to do and having this RS blog helps as it keeps me in check. What I post here I remind myself should be cel related or at the very least animation related after all when you make a post in your blog it goes right to the frontpage of RS which isn’t livejournal or myspace etc etc. Oh heck once in a while I’ll post some real life personal stuff but usually they are the harmless blog whines or snippets of “Whee I’m happy”.

Anyway, I’ve been thinking it’s so much more fun to be in the sidelines and just do stuff than to try to encourage other people to do things. One can go in and out whenever one pleases, just like I do here in RS and Beta. I’ve been itching to go back to some older interest but just the thought of the old days make me want to go bathe in a tub of lard and roll over in a frying pan. LOL. Which is probably why I spend more time re-arranging my cels than I do umm –other- stuff that I’m scheduled to do and finish in my other hobby, like maybe do some artwork, write fanfic, do some translating, site updating etc. etc. etc. I’ve had a lot of stuff that I’ve been sitting on, videos to encode, manga to go over, reviews to do and hunt for news but I don’t do any of that. I’ve managed to avoid it the past I don’t know, maybe it’s been a year. I’ve successfully managed to distract myself with other things and the biggest distraction right now are cels. Oh don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying the collecting hobby is just a distraction, I really like it, maybe even love it more now than umm my other stuff. Sure I think there are many down sides to the hobby, but it’s nice to just sit back and do your own thing, be as passive or as aggressive as you want. My only concern really is when I compare it to my other hobby… Someone told me it’s possible my interest has shifted, that I like cel collecting more and that it offers more variety and less headaches… Although that is true to an extent, then why do I sit here and keep thinking, I want to get back to doing the other stuff? I’m reminded of an old post tex-chan made about checking out, I’ve checked out for a long time now. I want to go back but can’t seem to do so. Weird. You’d think all you really need is the “want”. But I guess that’s not true. They say in writing, the reason people get writer’s block isn’t because they have run out of ideas, but it’s because they’re afraid of executing it and have managed to corner themselves. Maybe I’m afraid in that way... But also it’s so much more refreshing to just be a bystander and just observed, be content with what you think you know. That’s also probably why I like collecting so much now, the baggage is less or at least more tolerable than the others. I mean which collector will go up to another and tell them, “Damn that’s an awful cel!”? We all know only a jerk will do that.

Which brings to mind something very weird for me… If someone would come up to me now and ask, what’s so special about plastic? Why should I bother collecting it? Should they get into it? I could most probably give a decent answer, at least rationalize why I spend on it. But in retrospect, if someone was to ask me about my older hobby, I’d probably have to think long and hard trying to remember what did I like about it in the first place. Used to
re: eanie, meanie, minie, moeTuesday, February 20, 2007 - 12:10:29 AM

(blab continues...)

Used to be I had a thousand reasons why, now I only have one. Kind of sad… Oh well, thanks for reading even if what I said probably made no sense to anyone except me. I’m still waiting on a huge wishlist cel….. I can only hope it gets here tomorrow. Then I can blab all about that again instead of *points up*

re: eanie, meanie, minie, moeTuesday, February 20, 2007 - 8:16:02 AM

Sometimes, for yourself, you need to do exactly what you have done, which is "check out" of certain things. It doesn''t mean you love them less or are less devoted to them. It just means you need time away. Once you feel better about it, you can always go back. I know, in my case, I''ve reached a point where pretty much *everything* is getting to me, making me angry or upset, etc. It has a lot to do with things going on in my real life. But, instead of risking "publicly" being a person I am not, I decided to lay low for a while. Sounds like, maybe, you needed to do that, too, with your other hobby. Hopefully, you''ll be able to go back to it one of these days -- if you want to. *hugs* (Congrats on the up-coming wishlist cel, too!)

re: eanie, meanie, minie, moeWednesday, February 21, 2007 - 12:00:54 AM

Thanks Tex-chan. Really appreciate the kind ear. It''s been a while though since I''ve checked out and I want to go back, just finding it quite challenging to do so. Maybe more time is needed...

Oh and about my wishlist... I just found out it''s not shipped yet since my check hasn''t cleared. I thought it was on it''s way. I misunderstood... But hopefully within this week I can finally put it up!